1985 Ford Laser GL: owner review

I bought this little darling out of nostalgia last year. It’s a very close example of my first car. With COVID restrictions, I thought it would be a fun trip down memory lane and help pass the time.

She’s a beaut. From once being a ubiquitous sight on our roads, to now being the only one I have witnessed since I brought her home.

My first impression after a 20-year hiatus is just how precise cars have become, but at the same time they are still the same.

It took a while to master how to start it. Not because there’s anything wrong, but because you are supposed to pull the choke out partially (depending on the climate) and pump the accelerator a few times to activate the plunger. In hindsight it is normal, but a skill well forgotten given all this became automated decades ago.

The pollution on cold start is horrendous, but eases after you retract the choke.

Handling has three-tonne-truck-like performance. While the steering is light, it’s very sloppy. If you demand a corner beyond sedate, you will need to wait until the weight is transferred before you get a change in direction. I’d argue it’s still safe because it’s so sedate you would be very unlikely to put yourself in a dangerous situation. Push it too much and it will gently oversteer, but nothing unpredictable.

The brakes are best described as adequate. Energetic stopping will result in lock-up. It’s not a car you should ever rely on for braking quickly.

Engine-wise, I am quite surprised at how smooth and quiet the little 1.3 is, even when you rev it, which is a necessity just to keep up with regular traffic. I’d argue it’s smoother and gives a sweeter little note than a majority of modern engines, which is no small feat given the technology is over 40 years old.

Performance is basically non-existent. I wonder if people were simply more patient in its day, and our current driving habits have become a bit more aggressive, because I find very few people are content to remain behind me, even though I drive at limits.

The ride is very comfortable and it soaks up bumps like a pro, although the seats are absolutely atrocious for comfort. Anything more than an hour, I promise your body will feel it after, unless you're under 30.

Economy-wise? It does about 8L per 100km regardless of city or highway. Parts are ridiculously cheap. I bought new back shoe pads and it was just over $3 for the pair! A new set of four tyres cost me less than tyre one on my daily! It’s so, so cheap!

Technology is non-existent. There’s an FM radio. That’s it. No electronics. Nothing. But that’s the charm. I still find myself putting my thumb over the front of the steering wheel to turn the volume down or glance at the dash to see if the next left will give me a short cut, only to laugh when there’s nothing to answer my call. I like to joke that if a solar storm wipes out the grid, I’d be one of the very few people on the road!

I am very lucky to find this well-cared-for example of motoring history. Assembled in Homebush, it reminds me of simpler times. While it lacks so much compared to today, she always puts a smile on my face. She is very honest and lacks the aggression of modern cars, which is a breath of fresh air (except in cold start!).

But at the end of the journey, you realise it goes forward, backward, stops and steers exactly as you expect every time, which is really not much different to a current car – she just does it with less fanfare. She forces you to engage with her and the road, which is something that can’t be said about all modern cars.

Would I drive her daily? No. There’s too much comfort and convenience in a modern car. Is she more fun? Yeah, for sure. It’s a car you totally get your head around. She keeps no secrets and there’s no mystery… As daggy as she is.

My only problem? I still haven’t found the right name for her.

Owner: Mikey

MORE: Everything Ford